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Animal Jokes
[ Animal Jokes ]

·Octopus in the bar
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 Joke Books


Birds of a Feather
People Jokes Each evening bird lover Tom stood in his backyard, hooting like an owl. One happy night (for Tom), an owl called back to him. For a year, Tom and his feathered friend hooted back and forth. He even kept a log of the "conversation."

Just when Tom thought he was on the verge of a breakthrough in interspecies communication, his wife had a chat with her next door neighbor.

"My husband spends his nights calling out to owls," she said.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, December 29 @ 23:05:00 CST (1666 reads)
(Read More... | 519 bytes more | Score: 0)

Finding Homebase
Bar/Drunk Jokes Every night after dinner, Harry took off for the local watering hole. He would spend the whole evening there and always arrive home, well inebriated, around midnight each night.

He usually had trouble getting his key to fit the keyhole and couldn't get the door open. And, every time this happened, his wife would go to the door and let him in. Then, she would proceed to yell and scream at him for his constant nights out and coming home in a drunken state. But, Harry still continued his nightly routine.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, February 03 @ 00:08:09 CST (3200 reads)
(Read More... | 1704 bytes more | Score: 2)

The Business Marriage
People Jokes A businessman was being interviewed about his life and career when the subject of his wife of thirty years came up.

"To what do you attribute the success of your marriage?" asked the interviewer.

"Well," replied the businessman, "You know that saying 'Behind every successful man there's a woman'?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, November 05 @ 23:05:00 CST (1668 reads)
(Read More... | 425 bytes more | Score: 4)

Daddy, how was I born?
Computers/Support A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"

The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway!

Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, April 20 @ 10:02:25 CDT (57442 reads)
(Read More... | 648 bytes more | Score: 3.57)

The Greatest Hitter in the World!
Sports Jokes A little boy was overheard talking to himself as he strutted through the backyard, wearing his baseball cap and toting a ball and bat. "I'm the greatest hitter in the world," he announced.

Then, he tossed the ball into the air, swung at it, and missed.

"Strike One!" he yelled. Undaunted, he picked up the ball and said again, "I'm the greatest hitter in the world!" He tossed the ball into the air.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, August 21 @ 00:05:00 CDT (12286 reads)
(Read More... | 886 bytes more | Score: 1.75)

No One Knows what God Looks Like
Teacher/Student A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher paused and said, "but no one knows what God looks like."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, July 31 @ 00:05:00 CDT (4190 reads)
(Read More... | 467 bytes more | Score: 3)

There's No Place like Nome
Play On Words Flanman writes "Nome, in NW Alaska on the Bering Sea, is known for fabulous salmon fishing. But it is not well known that the milk from the indigenous Muskox, a large bison-like mammal with wool like sheep, makes equally fabulous butter. Milk from the female Muskox is churned in the Spring of each year and stored in casks in the cool waters of Nome River until Fall.

Melted and mixed with lemon juice, vinegar, seasoning, and egg yokes the result is a salmon sauce beyond comparison.

Families gather for feasting in November and December to relish the traditional salmon dinner topped with this unrivaled condiment."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, October 14 @ 00:05:00 CDT (13838 reads)
(Read More... | 693 bytes more | Score: 4)

Adult - Adults Only!: No Laughing Matter
Adult Jokes A old geezer goes to the doctors and says, "Doctor, I've got this problem, you see, only you've got to promise not to laugh".

The doctor replies,"Of course I won't laugh, that would be thoroughly unprofessional. In over twenty years of being a doctor I've never laughed at a patient".

"OK then," says the old geezer, and he drops his trousers.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, August 27 @ 00:05:00 CDT (2568 reads)
(Read More... | 835 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 5)

A guest at a blonde gathering
Blonde Jokes A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. "Would you mind telling me, Doctor," she asked, "how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, July 23 @ 00:16:56 CDT (1639 reads)
(Read More... | 796 bytes more | Score: 0)

Adult - Adults Only!: Dead Beaver
Adult Jokes Little Johnny walks in on his grandmother having a shower. He points and asks curiously, "What's that?

His grandmother replies "Oh! That's my beaver."

The next day, little Johnny walks in on his mother having a shower. Again, he points and asks curiously, "What's that?
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, September 01 @ 20:28:21 CDT (2709 reads)
(Read More... | 488 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 4)

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What are your favorite type of Jokes?

Play on Words
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 Today's Big Joke
There isn't a Biggest Story for Today, yet.

 Past Jokes
Saturday, April 10
· Football Fans vs. Nuns
Friday, April 09
· Diver Meets Guy Underwater
Thursday, April 08
· Oops!
Wednesday, April 07
· Mr. or Mrs. Computer
Tuesday, April 06
· Microsoft tech drafted
Monday, April 05
· History of the Internet
Sunday, April 04
· Octopus in the bar
Saturday, April 03
· Baby Turtle
Friday, April 02
· Sweet Tooth
Thursday, April 01
· Defensive Driving

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