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Horse walks into a bar, orders a beer, sits down at one of the tables, and starts reading his paper.
The bartender is a bit shocked by all this, but pours the beer, and brings it over to the horse, who proffers a ten dollar bill
for it. Now the barman figures the horse isn't that bright, so he decides to pull the old 'short-change' trick on him. He duly goes back to the horse with 1 dollar. The horse doesn't say a word.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, May 08 @ 00:19:45 CDT (1429 reads)
(Read More... | 689 bytes more | Score: 0)
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A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking.
The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large."
Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle.
The Texan immediately says, "We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows."
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, March 12 @ 23:05:00 CST (60893 reads)
(Read More... | 727 bytes more | Score: 4.30)
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Because of an ear infection, a family friend had to take Casey, her son, to visit the pediatrician.
She was impressed with the way the doctor directed his comments and questions to her son.
When he asked Casey, "Is there anything you are allergic to?" Casey nodded and whispered something in the doctor's ear.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, October 25 @ 00:05:00 CDT (8441 reads)
(Read More... | 765 bytes more | Score: 1.16)
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Dirty Golf Sayings That Are Not
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Oh, bite, sweatheart.
See it suck back to the hole?
I yanked it in the woods.
I pushed it in the swamp.
Never up, never in.
My head was a little late to impact.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, October 11 @ 00:05:00 CDT (26390 reads)
(Read More... | 426 bytes more | Score: 2.25)
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Ted and his wife were working in their garden one day when Ted looks over at his wife and says: "Your butt is getting really big, I mean really big! I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue."
With that he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then went over to where his wife was working and measured his wife's bottom. "Yes, I was right, your butt is two inches wider than the barbecue!!!!"
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Charlie and George were sitting in the park, talking, when the subject turned to getting older. Charlie said to George, "Women have all the luck when it comes to getting older."
"What do you mean?" asked George.
"Well," replied Charlie, "I can barely remember the last time I was able to get it up in bed, but my wife is healthier than ever!"
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A Farmer goes to the Vet and says, "My horse is constipated."
The vet says, "Take one of these pills, put it in a long tube, stick the other end in the horse's ass, and blow the pill up there."
The Farmer comes back the next day, and he looks very sick.
The Vet says, "What happened?"
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, October 10 @ 02:14:06 CDT (792 reads)
(Read More... | 371 bytes more | Score: 3)
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John O'Riley was a member of an Irish Toast Masters Club and one evening at the local Irish Toast Masters meeting, a contest was held to see who could deliver
the best toast.
Well, John O'Riley won the contest for the best toast of the evening, "Here's To The Best Years o' Me Life, Spent Between The Legs o' Me Wife."
When John O'Riley arrived home his beautiful wife asked him how the Toast Masters meeting went and he said, "I won the contest for the best toast of the evening."
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The school of agriculture's dean was interviewing a prospective student.
"Why have you chosen this career?" he asked.
"I dream of making a million dollars in farming, like my father," the student replied.
"Your father made a million dollars in farming?" echoed the dean, much impressed.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, December 13 @ 23:05:00 CST (7469 reads)
(Read More... | 390 bytes more | Score: 1.5)
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On the border of Kentucky and Tennessee there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a Kentucky farmer, while
the other half belongs to a Tennessee man.
One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Tennessee man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to
his house and calls his Kentucky neighbor.
"There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest."
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, April 03 @ 23:29:08 CST (8311 reads)
(Read More... | 646 bytes more | Score: 3.75)
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There isn't a Biggest Story for Today, yet. |
| Saturday, April 10 | | · | Football Fans vs. Nuns |
| Friday, April 09 | | · | Diver Meets Guy Underwater |
| Thursday, April 08 | | · | Oops! |
| Wednesday, April 07 | | · | Mr. or Mrs. Computer |
| Tuesday, April 06 | | · | Microsoft tech drafted |
| Monday, April 05 | | · | History of the Internet |
| Sunday, April 04 | | · | Octopus in the bar |
| Saturday, April 03 | | · | Baby Turtle |
| Friday, April 02 | | · | Sweet Tooth |
| Thursday, April 01 | | · | Defensive Driving |
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