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An old man in Mississippi is sitting on his front porch watching the sun rise. He sees the neighbor's kid walk by carrying something big under his arm. "Hey boy, whatcha got there?"
"Roll of chicken wire."
"What you gonna do with that?"
"Gonna catch some chickens."
"You damn fool! You can't catch chickens with chicken wire!" The boy just laughs and keeps walking.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, February 07 @ 00:05:00 CST (16384 reads)
(Read More... | 1334 bytes more | Score: 5)
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An Irish wife was having a shower and slipped over on the bathroom floor. Instead of slipping over forwards, she slipped over and did the splits and suctioned herself to the floor.
She yelled out for her husband. 'Paddy! Paddy!' she yelled.
Paddy came running in. 'Paddy I've suctioned myself to the floor,' she said.
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Getting a Good Nights Sleep
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An elderly woman went into the doctor's office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, "I'd like to have some birth control pills."
Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, "Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you're 75 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?"
The woman responded, "They help me sleep better."
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, September 08 @ 01:05:00 CDT (1484 reads)
(Read More... | 608 bytes more | Score: 0)
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A pastor was working late on a Saturday night at the Almighty God Tabernacle. Around 10:00 PM he decided to call his wife before he left for home.
Although the pastor let the phone ring several times, his wife didn't answer. A few moments later he tried again and she answered right away. He asked her why she hadn't answered before, and she said that the phone didn't ring.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, October 22 @ 01:05:00 CDT (8374 reads)
(Read More... | 1179 bytes more | Score: 3.91)
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After years of his wife's pleading, this rich good ole' boy finally goes with her to her little local Church on Sunday morning. He was so moved by the preacher's sermon that on the way out he stopped to shake his hand.
He said, "Reverend, that was the best damn sermon I ever did hear!"
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, September 08 @ 01:42:43 CDT (1242 reads)
(Read More... | 857 bytes more | Score: 0)
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On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the thermometer section.
You will need to purchase a rectal thermometer made by "Q-tip." Be very sure that you get this brand.
When you get home, lock your doors, draw the drapes, and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed during your therapy.
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, November 19 @ 00:05:00 CST (3155 reads)
(Read More... | 983 bytes more | Score: 4.33)
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A wife and her husband arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up their car and were told that the keys had been
accidentally locked in it.
The wife went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door.
As the husband watched from the passenger's side his wife instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open. "Hey," she announced to the technician, "It's open!"
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, May 19 @ 01:05:00 CDT (1216 reads)
(Read More... | 527 bytes more | Score: 0)
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Three men of the cloth, a Catholic, a Jew and an Episcopalian were on an airplane trip together. They ran into the worst
turbulence in the history of aviation on the whole flight.
When the plane finally landed, a reporter is there and starts interviewing people. The first one is the Catholic and when asked was he afraid, he answered, "I am Catholic my son and yes, I was afraid but I prayed to my God and I knew he would see me through it."
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, August 17 @ 04:46:35 CDT (1688 reads)
(Read More... | 1079 bytes more | Score: 4)
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George Bush Meets Little Johhny
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George Bush is out jogging one morning, notices Little Johnny on the corner with a box. Curious he runs over to Little Johnny and says, "What's in the box kid?"
Little Johnny says, "Kittens, they're brand new kittens."
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, September 17 @ 02:48:59 CDT (13138 reads)
(Read More... | 1110 bytes more | Score: 3.80)
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A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful young lady sitting at the bar.
After a drink and a little time gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chat with you for a while?"
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Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, January 24 @ 23:45:38 CST (1343 reads)
(Read More... | 952 bytes more | Score: 0)
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There isn't a Biggest Story for Today, yet. |
| Saturday, April 10 | | · | Football Fans vs. Nuns |
| Friday, April 09 | | · | Diver Meets Guy Underwater |
| Thursday, April 08 | | · | Oops! |
| Wednesday, April 07 | | · | Mr. or Mrs. Computer |
| Tuesday, April 06 | | · | Microsoft tech drafted |
| Monday, April 05 | | · | History of the Internet |
| Sunday, April 04 | | · | Octopus in the bar |
| Saturday, April 03 | | · | Baby Turtle |
| Friday, April 02 | | · | Sweet Tooth |
| Thursday, April 01 | | · | Defensive Driving |
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