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Joke Crazy: Play On Words

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Anybody know if Somebody found Nobody?
Play On Words This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.

Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, July 25 @ 00:54:12 CDT (4994 reads)
(Read More... | 530 bytes more | Score: 4.5)

The Menopausal Years
Play On Words One thing that has not changed since the beginning of time, is how women react sexually to menopause. It can be extremely beneficial for you to know when your wife is entering her Menopausal years. A guide has been put together for you to help understand all the terms associated with Menopause in order you may prepare and diagnose the condition.

Hot Flashes ~ You come home from work one chilly day in December, and are greeted at the front door with your wife wearing nothing but a smile. You later find out that all the widows have been welded open and that she has sold your home heating system on e-bay.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, May 25 @ 00:08:52 CDT (13189 reads)
(Read More... | 3636 bytes more | Score: 4.33)

What's Your Wish?
Play On Words A man walked into a bar looking disappointed and carrying a black bag over one shoulder. He sat down at the bar just as the bartender walked up.

"What's in the bag?," asked the bartender.

The man put the bag on the bar, reached in and pulled out a miniature baby grand piano, a small bench, and a 12-inch-tall man wearing a top hat and a tux with tails.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, December 05 @ 03:24:43 CST (2297 reads)
(Read More... | 1689 bytes more | Score: 3.5)

Gay Sitcom
Play On Words Q: Hear about the new gay sitcom?

A: "Leave it, it's Beaver."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, June 27 @ 00:05:00 CDT (12869 reads)
(Read More... | Score: 2.5)

Good for all occasions
Play On Words I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, April 14 @ 00:20:32 CDT (1907 reads)
(Read More... | 787 bytes more | Score: 0)

There's No Place like Nome
Play On Words Flanman writes "Nome, in NW Alaska on the Bering Sea, is known for fabulous salmon fishing. But it is not well known that the milk from the indigenous Muskox, a large bison-like mammal with wool like sheep, makes equally fabulous butter. Milk from the female Muskox is churned in the Spring of each year and stored in casks in the cool waters of Nome River until Fall.

Melted and mixed with lemon juice, vinegar, seasoning, and egg yokes the result is a salmon sauce beyond comparison.

Families gather for feasting in November and December to relish the traditional salmon dinner topped with this unrivaled condiment."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, October 14 @ 00:05:00 CDT (13929 reads)
(Read More... | 693 bytes more | Score: 4)

Computer beliefs
Play On Words Five reasons to believe computers are male:

1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
2. A better model is right around the corner.
3. They look attractive - until you take them home.
4. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
5. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, January 27 @ 00:31:42 CST (2360 reads)
(Read More... | 979 bytes more | Score: 0)

LACTOMANGULATION
Play On Words Manhandling the "open here" spout on amilk container so badly that one has to resort to the "illegal" side.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, April 05 @ 06:44:37 CDT (2096 reads)
(Read More... | Score: 1)

If you have seen one
Play On Words A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt, and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan."

Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mom. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Amal.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, May 31 @ 00:45:23 CDT (4582 reads)
(Read More... | 432 bytes more | Score: 3.6)

A Little Longer
Play On Words When I recently arrived at a very popular restaurant, I was dismayed to find it very crowded. Going up to the hostess I asked, "Will it be long?" Ignoring me, the hostess continued writing in her reservations book.

Thinking she had possibly not heard me the first time, I decided to ask again. "How much time is the wait for a table?"

Looking up from her book, the hostess smiled and said "About ten minutes. We will inform you when your table is ready."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, October 31 @ 23:05:00 CST (10622 reads)
(Read More... | 614 bytes more | Score: 4)

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 Past Jokes
Monday, March 31
· Definitions of Words by Gender
Thursday, February 06
· Mother Truckers
Tuesday, December 24
· Anagrams
Sunday, September 29
· Combining Corn
Thursday, July 25
· Anybody know if Somebody found Nobody?
Friday, July 19
· Candy Coated
Friday, May 31
· If you have seen one
Saturday, May 25
· The Menopausal Years
Wednesday, May 01
· Damn Spam from Hell
Sunday, April 07
· Ode to the Spell Checker!

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