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Joke Crazy: Play On Words

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Just a Little
Play On Words A huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender hands him the beer and says, "You know, I'm not gay but I want to compliment you on your physique, it really is phenomenal! I have a question though, why is your head so small?"

The big guy nods slowly. He's obviously fielded this question many times. "One day," he begins, "I was hunting when I got lost in the woods. I heard someone crying for help and finally realized that it was coming from a frog sitting next to a stream. So I picked up the frog and it said, "Kiss me. Kiss me and I will turn into a genie and grant you 3 wishes." So I looked around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog a kiss.

POOF! The frog turned into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, September 05 @ 00:05:00 CDT (11076 reads)
(Read More... | 1499 bytes more | Score: 5)

Damn Spam from Hell
Play On Words "I am DAMNED, DAMNED-I-Am."

"I do not like that DAMNED-I-Am."

"Do you like porn and scam SPAM?"

"I do not like porn and scam SPAM, DAMNED I Am."

"Would you want it on your Palm? Would you send it to your mom?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, May 01 @ 02:12:05 CDT (2876 reads)
(Read More... | 1415 bytes more | Score: 0)

This is Cat
Play On Words Read each line ALOUD:

This is this cat
This is is cat
This is how cat
This is to cat
This is keep cat
This is a cat
This is dumbass cat
This is busy cat
This is for cat
This is about cat
This is ten cat
This is seconds cat
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, August 07 @ 00:05:00 CDT (15466 reads)
(Read More... | 376 bytes more | Score: 3.33)

This ones on You
Play On Words Q. Did you hear the joke they're not telling to assholes?
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, May 04 @ 00:05:00 CDT (11196 reads)
(Read More... | 59 bytes more | Score: 0)

Actual Signs
Play On Words In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

In a nonsmoking area, "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, April 21 @ 00:09:40 CDT (2105 reads)
(Read More... | 1488 bytes more | Score: 0)

I can't sleep without it
Play On Words Amber: Oh, come on. Please?

Fred: No. Leave me alone.

Amber: It won't take too long.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, April 16 @ 23:37:36 CDT (2188 reads)
(Read More... | 1058 bytes more | Score: 0)

Computer beliefs
Play On Words Five reasons to believe computers are male:

1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
2. A better model is right around the corner.
3. They look attractive - until you take them home.
4. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
5. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, January 27 @ 00:31:42 CST (2327 reads)
(Read More... | 979 bytes more | Score: 0)

Where is that Dictionary
Play On Words Eye have a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write.
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
and eye can put the error rite.
Its rare lea ever wrong.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, April 20 @ 00:05:00 CDT (2765 reads)
(Read More... | 583 bytes more | Score: 0)

Same Thing
Play On Words Walking through San Francisco's Chinatown, a recent tourist from the Midwest was fascinated with all the Chinese restaurants, shops, signs and banners. One particular building, however, caught his eye with the sign "Moishe Plotnik's Chinese Laundry."

"Moishe Plotnik?" he wondered. "How does that fit in Chinatown?"

So he walked into the shop and saw a fairly standard looking Chinese laundry. He could see that the proprietors were clearly aware of the uniqueness of the name as there were baseball hats, T- Shirts and coffee mugs emblazoned with the logo "Moishe Plotnik's Chinese Laundry."

There was also a fair selection of Chinatown souvenirs, indicating that the name alone had brought many tourists into the shop. The tourist selected a coffee cup as a conversation piece to take back to his office.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, December 18 @ 23:05:00 CST (11455 reads)
(Read More... | 1745 bytes more | Score: 4)

The Menopausal Years
Play On Words One thing that has not changed since the beginning of time, is how women react sexually to menopause. It can be extremely beneficial for you to know when your wife is entering her Menopausal years. A guide has been put together for you to help understand all the terms associated with Menopause in order you may prepare and diagnose the condition.

Hot Flashes ~ You come home from work one chilly day in December, and are greeted at the front door with your wife wearing nothing but a smile. You later find out that all the widows have been welded open and that she has sold your home heating system on e-bay.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, May 25 @ 00:08:52 CDT (13034 reads)
(Read More... | 3636 bytes more | Score: 4.33)

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 Past Jokes
Monday, March 31
· Definitions of Words by Gender
Thursday, February 06
· Mother Truckers
Tuesday, December 24
· Anagrams
Sunday, September 29
· Combining Corn
Thursday, July 25
· Anybody know if Somebody found Nobody?
Friday, July 19
· Candy Coated
Friday, May 31
· If you have seen one
Saturday, May 25
· The Menopausal Years
Wednesday, May 01
· Damn Spam from Hell
Sunday, April 07
· Ode to the Spell Checker!

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