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Joke Crazy: Play On Words

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Fun Guy
Play On Words A mushroom walks into a bar one evening, sits down, and orders a drink.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, April 19 @ 02:33:06 CDT (2244 reads)
(Read More... | 200 bytes more | Score: 2)

Computer beliefs
Play On Words Five reasons to believe computers are male:

1. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless.
2. A better model is right around the corner.
3. They look attractive - until you take them home.
4. Big power surges knock them out for the rest of the night.
5. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, January 27 @ 00:31:42 CST (2331 reads)
(Read More... | 979 bytes more | Score: 0)

Combining Corn
Play On Words A farmer was sitting at the table while his wife was preparing dinner. His wife dropped a spoon and bent over to pick it up. As she bent over the farmer said, "Honey, your butt is as big as a combine."

The wife picks up the spoon and continues cooking with no comment to her husband. As she put the dinner on the table she dropped the pepper shaker on the floor. While she was bent over picking it up the farmer said, "Honey I take that back. Your butt is as big as two combines!"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, September 29 @ 01:54:14 CDT (8609 reads)
(Read More... | 976 bytes more | Score: 4.96)

This ones on You
Play On Words Q. Did you hear the joke they're not telling to assholes?
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, May 04 @ 00:05:00 CDT (11199 reads)
(Read More... | 59 bytes more | Score: 0)

Anybody know if Somebody found Nobody?
Play On Words This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody.

There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.

Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, July 25 @ 00:54:12 CDT (4937 reads)
(Read More... | 530 bytes more | Score: 4.5)

Play On Words Tiggs writes "An Anagram, as you all know, is a word or phrase made by transposing or rearranging the letters of another word or phrase. The following are exceptionally clever. Someone out there either has far too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble.
George Bush: When you rearrange the letters:
He bugs Gore
Dormitory: When you rearrange the letters:
Dirty Room"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, December 23 @ 23:05:00 CST (5323 reads)
(Read More... | 2145 bytes more | Score: 4.75)

Definitions of Words by Gender
Play On Words THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female: Any part under a car's hood.
Male: The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female: Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male: Playing football without a helmet.

COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female: The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male: Scratching out a note before suddenly taking off for a weekend with
the boys.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, March 30 @ 23:05:00 CST (6445 reads)
(Read More... | 1659 bytes more | Score: 3.77)

Just a Little
Play On Words A huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender hands him the beer and says, "You know, I'm not gay but I want to compliment you on your physique, it really is phenomenal! I have a question though, why is your head so small?"

The big guy nods slowly. He's obviously fielded this question many times. "One day," he begins, "I was hunting when I got lost in the woods. I heard someone crying for help and finally realized that it was coming from a frog sitting next to a stream. So I picked up the frog and it said, "Kiss me. Kiss me and I will turn into a genie and grant you 3 wishes." So I looked around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog a kiss.

POOF! The frog turned into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, September 05 @ 00:05:00 CDT (11080 reads)
(Read More... | 1499 bytes more | Score: 5)

Barbeque Zone
Play On Words A couple had been married 15 years. One afternoon they were working in the garden together.

As the wife was bending over pulling weeds the husband said, "Hey honey, you are getting fat. Your butt is getting huge. I bet it's as big as the gas grill now."

The husband feeling he needed to prove his point, got a yardstick, measured the grill and then measured his wife's butt.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, December 10 @ 23:27:14 CST (2394 reads)
(Read More... | 1050 bytes more | Score: 3)

Actual Signs
Play On Words In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."

In a nonsmoking area, "If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, April 21 @ 00:09:40 CDT (2107 reads)
(Read More... | 1488 bytes more | Score: 0)

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What are your favorite type of Jokes?

Play on Words
Teacher / Student


Votes: 3747
Comments: 9

 Today's Big Joke
There isn't a Biggest Story for Today, yet.

 Past Jokes
Monday, March 31
· Definitions of Words by Gender
Thursday, February 06
· Mother Truckers
Tuesday, December 24
· Anagrams
Sunday, September 29
· Combining Corn
Thursday, July 25
· Anybody know if Somebody found Nobody?
Friday, July 19
· Candy Coated
Friday, May 31
· If you have seen one
Saturday, May 25
· The Menopausal Years
Wednesday, May 01
· Damn Spam from Hell
Sunday, April 07
· Ode to the Spell Checker!

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