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Joke Crazy: Religion Jokes

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And God Created Eve
Religion Jokes At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings.

Little Tommy, a child in the kindergarten class, seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.

Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and asked, "Tommy, what's the matter?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, June 12 @ 01:05:00 CDT (2761 reads)
(Read More... | 458 bytes more | Score: 3.5)

Hammer + Thumb = Trouble
Religion Jokes My minister was making a wooden trellis to support a climbing vine. As he was pounding away, he noticed that a little boy was watching him. The youngster didn't say a word, so the preacher kept on working, thinking the boy would leave.

However, the little boy he didn't leave. Pleased at the thought that his work was being admired, the pastor finally said, "Well, son, trying to pick up some pointers on gardening?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, December 12 @ 00:05:00 CST (15451 reads)
(Read More... | 544 bytes more | Score: 4.75)

Bragging Rights
Religion Jokes A guy goes into confession and says to the priest, "Father, I'm 80 years old, and married, with four kids and eleven grandchildren... Last night I had an affair. I made love to a couple of 18 year old girls... both of them... twice!"

"Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?" asked the priest.

"Never Father. I don't belong to your church."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, June 13 @ 01:09:23 CDT (1857 reads)
(Read More... | 513 bytes more | Score: 0)

Super fast
Religion Jokes A little boy was sitting on the curb with a gallon of turpentine and shaking it up and watching all the bubbles. A little while later a Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had. The little boy replied, "This is the most powerful liquid in the world, its called turpentine."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, June 25 @ 04:56:50 CDT (1759 reads)
(Read More... | 636 bytes more | Score: 0)

Man of Another Cloth
Religion Jokes Three men of the cloth, a Catholic, a Jew and an Episcopalian were on an airplane trip together. They ran into the worst turbulence in the history of aviation on the whole flight.

When the plane finally landed, a reporter is there and starts interviewing people. The first one is the Catholic and when asked was he afraid, he answered, "I am Catholic my son and yes, I was afraid but I prayed to my God and I knew he would see me through it."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, August 17 @ 04:46:35 CDT (2005 reads)
(Read More... | 1079 bytes more | Score: 4)

One Last Confession
Religion Jokes When nuns are admitted to heaven they go through a special gate and are expected to make one last confession before they become angels.

Several nuns are lined up at this gate waiting to be absolved of their last sins before they are made holy.

'And so,' says Saint Peter, 'have you ever had any contact with a man's penis?'
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, August 28 @ 02:54:05 CDT (1866 reads)
(Read More... | 1151 bytes more | Score: 0)

My Greatest Sin
Religion Jokes Three nuns on a train had been getting to know one another and decided to tell each other what their greatest sins were.

The first nun says, "My greatest sin is sex. Every year I go out for a week and work as a prostitute. Of course, I put all the money I earn into the poor box."

The second nun says, "My greatest sin is drinking. Every year I take the money from the poor box and go out drinking for a solid week."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, March 21 @ 00:05:00 CST (2661 reads)
(Read More... | 709 bytes more | Score: 3)

Fallen Confession
Religion Jokes There was this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery. One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I'll quit!"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, April 22 @ 02:00:09 CDT (1889 reads)
(Read More... | 993 bytes more | Score: 0)

No Rain no Gain
Religion Jokes One summer, a drought threatened the crop in a small town. On a hot and dry Sunday, the village parson told his congregation, "There isn't anything that will save us except to pray for rain. Go home, pray, believe, and come back next Sunday ready to thank God for sending rain."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, July 13 @ 00:53:31 CDT (1821 reads)
(Read More... | 642 bytes more | Score: 4)

Dentures to the Rescue
Religion Jokes Our local minister had all of his remaining teeth pulled and new dentures made a few weeks ago.

The first Sunday, his sermon lasted 10 minutes. The second Sunday, he preached only 20 minutes. But, on the third Sunday, he preached for an hour and a half.

I asked him about this. He then told me "well, John, that first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, September 08 @ 05:00:11 CDT (1889 reads)
(Read More... | 559 bytes more | Score: 3)

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 Past Jokes
Wednesday, October 22
· Almighty God Tabernacle
Friday, October 10
· A Man of Few Words
Monday, September 29
· Spiritually Prepared
Saturday, September 27
· Running on Faith
Monday, August 04
· Chef Boy-Ar-Dee
Thursday, June 12
· And God Created Eve
Sunday, June 08
· The River of Reason
Wednesday, May 28
· Sex and Birth Control
Friday, April 25
· Hallelujah! Hallelujah!
Wednesday, April 16
· You Just Never Know

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