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Joke Crazy: Computers/Support

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Computer Age Sayings
Computers/Support 1. Home is where you hang your @.
2. The E-mail of the species is more deadly than the mail.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, April 11 @ 00:51:59 CDT (3719 reads)
(Read More... | 1328 bytes more | Score: 4.5)

Computer Lab Workstations
Computers/Support A friend was on duty in the main computer lab on a quiet afternoon when he noticed a young woman sitting in front of one of the workstations with her arms crossed across her chest, staring at the screen.

After about 15 minutes he noticed that she was still in the same position, only now she was impatiently tapping her foot.

Finally he approached her and asked if she needed help.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, January 22 @ 23:05:00 CST (54683 reads)
(Read More... | 490 bytes more | Score: 2.83)

Bad Tech Support
Computers/Support 1. Do you have a sledgehammer or brick handy?

2. ... that's right, not even MacGyver could fix it.

3. So -- what are you wearing?

4. Bummer Duuuuuuuude.

5. Looks like you're gonna need some new dilythium crystals, Cap'n.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, March 19 @ 23:05:00 CST (80678 reads)
(Read More... | 681 bytes more | Score: 2.4)

Tech support
Computers/Support Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the performance of flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, September 02 @ 02:09:18 CDT (4406 reads)
(Read More... | 1659 bytes more | Score: 4.5)

If a Mac was a SEAL
Computers/Support The office Mac fan posted:

"Being a Mac user is like being a Navy SEAL: a small, elite group of people with access to the most sophisticated technology in the world, who everyone calls on to get the really tough jobs done quickly and efficiently."

The office PC disciple responded

"Being a Mac user *is* like being a SEAL: a shrinking, endangered group of animals that bark very loudly but are harmless, who are economically valued only when they are dead."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, February 11 @ 23:05:00 CST (22936 reads)
(Read More... | Score: 3.6)

Supply & Demand
Computers/Support A woman was shopping in a computer discount store. She was looking for a bargain in a sub-300 MHZ model.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, April 15 @ 17:48:08 CDT (2321 reads)
(Read More... | 573 bytes more | Score: 0)

Microsoft tech drafted
Computers/Support One of Microsoft Network's finest support techs was drafted into the Army and sent to boot camp.

At the rifle range, he was given some instructions, handed a rifle, and a couple rounds of ammo. He loaded the rifle and fired several shots at the target which was fifty yards away.

The report came from the target area that all of his attempts had completely missed the target
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, April 06 @ 12:10:00 CDT (25824 reads)
(Read More... | 818 bytes more | Score: 3)

History of the Internet
Computers/Support In ancient Israel, it came to pass that a trader by the name of Abraham Com, did take unto himself a young wife by the name of Dot. And Dot Com was a homely woman, broad of shoulder and long of leg.

Indeed, she had been called Amazon Dot Com.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, April 05 @ 15:30:37 CDT (28041 reads)
(Read More... | 2163 bytes more | Score: 3)

Mr. or Mrs. Computer
Computers/Support Is your computer male or female? As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., "Steady as she goes", or "She's listing to starboard, Captain!"). Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should also be referred to as being female. Their reasons for drawing this conclusion follow
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, April 07 @ 13:40:00 CDT (29818 reads)
(Read More... | 1697 bytes more | Score: 4.5)

Computers vs Cars
Computers/Support For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.

At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with
technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that gets 1,000 miles to the gallon".

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, June 20 @ 00:05:00 CDT (8863 reads)
(Read More... | 2200 bytes more | Score: 5)

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Teacher / Student


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 Today's Big Joke
There isn't a Biggest Story for Today, yet.

 Past Jokes
Friday, November 14
· Hi-Tech Pain
Wednesday, July 30
· Dead Serious on Computer Viruses
Friday, June 20
· Computers vs Cars
Wednesday, May 21
· Home of the Whopper
Wednesday, February 05
· Check out AOL's New Offer
Saturday, November 03
· Lost in a Haze
Thursday, September 13
· The Joy of Windows
Sunday, September 02
· Tech support
Wednesday, August 15
· Wife 1.0
Saturday, June 23
· How to Truly Impress A Client

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