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Joke Crazy: All Other Jokes

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Ever Wonder
All Other Jokes Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, July 02 @ 00:26:10 CDT (3440 reads)
(Read More... | 1410 bytes more | Score: 5)

Land Sales Comparison
All Other Jokes When we were looking to buy property I had this over zealous realtor show us what can only be described as a totally worn-out old farm. I mean the land had just been worked to death. The weeds were hardly even growing.

The smiling super salesman said, "Now really, all this land needs is a little water, a nice cool breeze and some good people."

I replied, "Yeah, I agree, but couldn't the same be said of Hell?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, July 24 @ 00:05:00 CDT (11415 reads)
(Read More... | Score: 1)

Having a fine dining experience
All Other Jokes A husband and wife were having a fine dining experience at their exclusive country club when this stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, says she'll see him later and walks away.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, July 30 @ 01:28:04 CDT (1750 reads)
(Read More... | 1187 bytes more | Score: 0)

Colonel Call in
All Other Jokes Having just moved into his new office (and feeling quite proud about it), the new Colonel was sitting at his desk when an airman knocked on the door.

Conscious of his new position, the Colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the airman to enter, and said into the phone,

"Yes, General, I'll be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, July 18 @ 00:05:00 CDT (10499 reads)
(Read More... | 642 bytes more | Score: 3)

Bird Is The Word
All Other Jokes One day, a guy was on his way home from work when the most remarkable thing happened. Traffic was heavy as usual, and as he sat there at a red light, out of nowhere a bird slammed into his windshield. If that wasn't strange enough, the poor creature got its wing stuck under the windshield wiper.

Just then the light turned green and there the guy was with a bird stuck on his windshield. Without any other apparent options, he turned on the windshield wipers to try to get rid of the bird. It actually worked.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, October 11 @ 23:40:26 CDT (1600 reads)
(Read More... | 993 bytes more | Score: 5)

Its that Navy Reputation Thing
All Other Jokes By the time the sailor pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken.

"You've got to have a room somewhere," he pleaded. "Or just a bed, I don't care where."

"Well, I do have a double room with one occupant - an Air Force guy," admitted the manager, "and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, May 26 @ 23:43:54 CDT (2994 reads)
(Read More... | 1179 bytes more | Score: 3)

Exposing the Truth about Gardening
All Other Jokes Once there was a beautiful woman who loved to work in her vegetable garden, but no matter what she did, she couldn't get her tomatoes to ripen. Admiring her neighbor's garden, which had beautiful bright red tomatoes, she went one day and inquired of him his secret.

"It's really quite simple," the old man explained. "Twice each day, in the morning and in the evening, I expose myself in front of the tomatoes and they turn red with embarrassment."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, January 28 @ 03:32:21 CST (1948 reads)
(Read More... | 810 bytes more | Score: 0)

Become a mind reader in one easy lesson
All Other Jokes One day a young man was visiting the fair. Over to one side was a small tent, with a sign that said "For 50 dollars I'll teach you to be a mind reader! - Apply within."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, July 16 @ 02:24:00 CDT (1560 reads)
(Read More... | 1246 bytes more | Score: 4)

Airing the Baggage
All Other Jokes During taxi, the crew of a US AIR departure flight to Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. The irate ground controller (a female) screamed, "US Air 2771, whereare you going? I told you to turn right on "Charlie" taxiway; you turned right on "Delta. Stop right there! I know it's difficult to tell the difference between C's & D's, but get it right!"

Continuing her lashing to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically, "God, you've screwed everything up; it'll take forever to sortthis out. You stay right there and don't move until I tell you to! Then, I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you. You got that, US Air 2771?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, July 20 @ 07:17:08 CDT (2936 reads)
(Read More... | 1037 bytes more | Score: 4)

Having to much fun
All Other Jokes A jealous husband hires a private detective to check on the movements of his wife. The husband wants more than a written report: he wants movies of his wife's activities.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, July 01 @ 20:05:11 CDT (1388 reads)
(Read More... | 877 bytes more | Score: 0)

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 Past Jokes
Tuesday, November 19
· Q-tip Quality Control
Friday, November 15
· Just Clowning Around
Wednesday, September 04
· AOL's Raising Prices
Monday, August 19
· Only In America
Saturday, July 20
· Airing the Baggage
Tuesday, July 02
· Ever Wonder
Monday, July 01
· Only in America
Sunday, May 26
· Its that Navy Reputation Thing
Friday, May 24
· Signs and billboards found
Thursday, May 23
· Why did the chicken cross the road?

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