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The 11th Commandment
Heaven and Hell During a recent staff meeting in Heaven, God, Moses, and Saint Peter concluded that the behavior of President Clinton and Rep. Gary Condit had brought about the need for an eleventh commandment.

They worked long and hard in a brainstorming session to try to settle on the wording of the new commandment, because they realized that it should have the same style, majesty and dignity as the original ten.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, July 06 @ 00:37:00 CDT (2955 reads)
(Read More... | 552 bytes more | Score: 0)

The Business Marriage
People Jokes A businessman was being interviewed about his life and career when the subject of his wife of thirty years came up.

"To what do you attribute the success of your marriage?" asked the interviewer.

"Well," replied the businessman, "You know that saying 'Behind every successful man there's a woman'?"
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, November 05 @ 23:05:00 CST (1636 reads)
(Read More... | 425 bytes more | Score: 4)

Break Even
People Jokes A stockbroker was "cold calling" about a penny stock and found Mr. Jones, a client. "I think this one will really move," said the broker, "it's only $1 a share."

"Buy me 1,000 shares," said Jones. The next day the stock was at $2.

Mr. Jones called the broker and said, "You were right! Buy me 5000 more shares." The next day Mr. Jones looked in the paper and the stock was at $4.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, November 09 @ 23:05:00 CST (1913 reads)
(Read More... | 804 bytes more | Score: 0)

Adult - Adults Only!: Tell Tale Signs
Adult Jokes One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."

"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer at the drugstore at the corner. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars ... a hell of a lot cheaper than a doctor."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, November 29 @ 07:55:49 CST (2926 reads)
(Read More... | 1644 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 4.38)

Cow Killer celabrates with party
News/Politics Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a country road one evening when a cow ran in front of the car.

The driver tried to avoid it but couldn't - the cow was killed.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Saturday, April 28 @ 00:13:06 CDT (3693 reads)
(Read More... | 843 bytes more | Score: 5)

New Breed of Fighting Weapons
People Jokes Tiggs writes "Bob was joining the army and they were handing out rifles when he arrived, so he got in line. When it got to Bob, they had run out of guns. The man issuing rifles gave him a broom.

''This is a magic broom -- point it at anybody, say 'Bangity bangity bang,' and they will die.''

Bob was really worried because he didn't think it would work, but he got in line for bayonets, thinking he might stand a chance if he could stab them to death. "
Posted by JokeCrazy on Tuesday, April 22 @ 00:05:00 CDT (2481 reads)
(Read More... | 1435 bytes more | Score: 4)

Adult - Adults Only!: Dream Situation
Adult Jokes Three guys are traveling and they need to get a room for the night. They put all of their money together but they still only had enough money to get one room, so that meant they all had to sleep in one bed.

They slept that night and when they woke up the guy on the far left said, "I had the weirdest dream, I dreamed that I was beating off."

The guy on the far right said, "I had the same dream."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, June 24 @ 03:04:59 CDT (1962 reads)
(Read More... | 506 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 0)

Adult - Adults Only!: New Breed of Slot Machines
Adult Jokes A man is walking down the street, when he sees a machine with two holes and with a sign overhead that reads: 'Blow Job'. The machine has two slots, one for one dollar and one for a quarter.

He looks in his pockets and finds a dollar and a quarter. He throws the dollar in the machine and sticks his penis into the first hole. And, surprisingly, it feels good . . . it feels very good . . . And just when he's about to come, the machine stops.

So he puts his dick in the other hole and puts the quarter in. And it hurts, it hurts. At first he is not even able to take his dick out, but when he does, it's raw and covered with blood.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, April 03 @ 23:05:00 CST (2420 reads)
(Read More... | 1091 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 4.33)

Adult - Adults Only!: Best Tent Pole in the Land
Adult Jokes Joe woke up one morning and looked for his wife, Sue, but she wasn't there. She had awakened and was preparing breakfast in the kitchen.

Joe was afraid he might spoil 'the moment' by getting up, so he wrote out a note, called his son, and sent the little boy to deliver the note to Sue.

THE TENT POLE IS UP,
THE CANVAS IS SPREAD,
THE HELL WITH BREAKFAST,
COME BACK TO BED.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, February 01 @ 23:05:00 CST (12383 reads)
(Read More... | 969 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 4)

Siltent Stutter Stance
People Jokes A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"

The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing.

The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?" Again, the clerk doesn't answer him.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, March 29 @ 23:17:30 CST (1750 reads)
(Read More... | 810 bytes more | Score: 3.5)



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