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 Joke Books


Car Roof Check
Bar/Drunk Jokes A drunken man was wondering around the parking lot of a bar, bumping into every car and then rubbing the roofs of the cars.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, June 04 @ 06:46:21 CDT (1810 reads)
(Read More... | 462 bytes more | Score: 0)

Promotion Demotion
People Jokes Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end.

Finally she couldn't take it any longer, and told him, "Listen, it means nothing, they even have a vice president of peas at the grocery store!"

"Really?" he said. Not sure if this was true or not, Tom decided to call the grocery store.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, April 22 @ 00:56:15 CDT (2036 reads)
(Read More... | 555 bytes more | Score: 0)

Finding Homebase
Bar/Drunk Jokes Every night after dinner, Harry took off for the local watering hole. He would spend the whole evening there and always arrive home, well inebriated, around midnight each night.

He usually had trouble getting his key to fit the keyhole and couldn't get the door open. And, every time this happened, his wife would go to the door and let him in. Then, she would proceed to yell and scream at him for his constant nights out and coming home in a drunken state. But, Harry still continued his nightly routine.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, February 03 @ 00:08:09 CST (3047 reads)
(Read More... | 1704 bytes more | Score: 2)

Things I've Learned
People Jokes Tiggs writes "What I've Learned As I've Matured

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it."
Posted by JokeCrazy on Wednesday, January 22 @ 23:05:00 CST (1469 reads)
(Read More... | 1333 bytes more | Score: 0)

Adult - Adults Only!: Past Tense
Adult Jokes A couple married thirty years were revisiting the same places they went to on their honeymoon. Driving through the secluded countryside, they passed a ranch with a tall deer fence running along the road.

The woman said, "Sweetheart, let's do the same thing we did here thirty years ago."

The old geezer stopped the car. His wife backed against the fence, and they made love like never before.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, July 07 @ 00:06:11 CDT (2708 reads)
(Read More... | 651 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 0)

The Floor Check
Bar/Drunk Jokes A drunk staggers into a bar demanding a beer. The bartender informed him that he was not allowed to serve alcohol to drunken patrons.

After a few harsh words, the bartender suggested to the drunk to prove he wasn't drunk by doing twenty push-ups on the floor.

As he was doing the push-ups, another drunk staggers into the bar and sees this guy on the floor doing push-ups.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Thursday, August 29 @ 01:59:15 CDT (3512 reads)
(Read More... | 520 bytes more | Score: 3.33)

Adult - Adults Only!: Ways of a Woman
If you don't open my door.

But I don't have to.

But you're still gonna pay.

And a damn good weapon.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Monday, March 04 @ 22:42:04 CST (3994 reads)
(Read More... | 767 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 0)

Effective Nonetheless
Medical Jokes Craig, the clerk in the small drug store, wasn't much of a salesman. He could never find the item the customer wanted. Joe, the owner, had had enough of his clerk's incompetence and warned Craig that the next sale he missed would be his last.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Sunday, September 23 @ 00:52:44 CDT (1290 reads)
(Read More... | 780 bytes more | Score: 0)

Bed Time Pit Stop
Teacher/Student A young man visited his sister who was married to a farmer in a poor district of the country. Since there were limited
accommodations, he was required to sleep with his young nephew.

When the young man came into the bedroom, he saw the little boy kneeling at the side of the bed with his head bowed.

Thinking this was the child's religious upbringing, he decided to present a good example and kneeled at the other side of the bed with his head bowed.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, July 25 @ 00:05:00 CDT (3019 reads)
(Read More... | 694 bytes more | Score: 5)

Adult - Adults Only!: Dishmaster
Adult Jokes This guy has always dreamed of owning a Harley Davidson. One day he has finally saved up enough money so he goes down to the dealer. After he picks out the perfect bike, the dealer tells him about an old biker trick that will keep the chrome on his new bike free from rust.

The dealer tells him that all he has to do is to keep a jar of Vaseline handy and put it on the chrome before it rains, and everything will be fine. He happily pays for the bike and leaves.

A few months later, the young man meets a woman and falls in love. She asks him to come home and meet her parents over dinner. He readily accepts and the date is set. At the appointed time, he picks her up on his Harley and they ride to her parents house.
Posted by JokeCrazy on Friday, August 02 @ 14:34:38 CDT (2208 reads)
(Read More... | 1803 bytes more | Adult - Adults Only! | Score: 3.66)

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What are your favorite type of Jokes?

Play on Words
Teacher / Student


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 Today's Big Joke
There isn't a Biggest Story for Today, yet.

 Past Jokes
Saturday, April 10
· Football Fans vs. Nuns
Friday, April 09
· Diver Meets Guy Underwater
Thursday, April 08
· Oops!
Wednesday, April 07
· Mr. or Mrs. Computer
Tuesday, April 06
· Microsoft tech drafted
Monday, April 05
· History of the Internet
Sunday, April 04
· Octopus in the bar
Saturday, April 03
· Baby Turtle
Friday, April 02
· Sweet Tooth
Thursday, April 01
· Defensive Driving

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