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Good for all occasions
Posted on Saturday, April 14 @ 00:20:32 CDT by JokeCrazy

Play On Words I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. A second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

He's as fast as the lead cat in a dog sled team.

Paper clip: The larval stage of coat hangers.

I've got a plan so sharp you could pick your teeth with it.

I hate the country, all those animals walking around un-cooked.

Chaos, panic, pandemonium - my work here is done.

I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you.

Sorry - yesterday was the deadline for all complaints.


 
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